It doesn't feel overly real yet, although it is sinking in today. As I cleaned the cat carrier this afternoon, my heart felt heavy.
Once it was clean & dry I put it in the house with it's door open, so he could get used to it. He sniffed it thoroughly, then tentatively went inside, and then lay down and promptly fell asleep. It showed me that, yes, he will get used to a new home, despite all my misgivings if we are making the right decision.
Why are we giving him away? The reason is twofold. 1) We are moving soon, hopefully this Fall but at least this Winter. I want a fresh start in a new house, without the smell, fur, and messes that come with a cat. 2) As you know, we're adopting. Don't know when, but eventually we'll have a baby. And although lots of other people have babies & pets together, I simply don't like the idea of Baby lying on the floor putting handfuls of fur into their mouth. (Oh, and I'm also allergic to cats - the allergy doctor recommended I "get rid" of my cat a long time ago, but I haven't listened. This is not a deciding factor in Smacky moving, but I am hoping it helps clear up some of my allergies.)
So he's going. And despite it being our decision, we're still really torn and sad.
I asked Hubby yesterday when we went to bed if he was wondering when the tears were going to start. He said he had been wondering. I assured him "tomorrow night - when he's in his new home and we're back here without him and I'm wondering if he's okay". Yup. Almost guaranteed. At least I'm not in PMS, lol. That should make things easier!
Silly thing is, I know he'll be okay. He's going to my brother & sis-in-law's, so we'll get to see him whenever we want. And really...he's just an animal...AGH, I have to tell myself that all the time, so I stop putting human emotions on him!! But, man, it's hard not to!!
Sometimes I list the things I won't miss about him, to help make myself more okay with our decision. For example:
-fur EVERYWHERE (he's long-haired)
-loud meowing (he's VERY vocal)
-crumbs of litter that stick to your feet and somehow make it onto the clean sheets
-people sitting gingerly on the edges of our couches so they don't get furry/people complaining about getting furry
-cost of litter and food (mild, I know, compared to a baby's needs)
-not having to watch the door so that he doesn't escape
Of course, though, I also will really miss:
-his cuddling (he is a very affectionate cat - not one of those aloof ones)
-pure entertainment (read: midnight crazies)
-how well I know him (what every different meow means, for example)
-the comfort of knowing what that "bump in the night" is (whether it really is him or not is moot point)
-our routine (his reaching up to be picked up every morning)
-conversing (like I said, he's talkative)
-hugs (yes, he does)
-being greeted when we get home
-his adorableness, especially when he's sleeping
-and much more!
We've had him for about 7 years (he's about 7 1/2 years old) and I've amassed a LARGE collection of pictures of him. Here are just a few for you to enjoy:
|Silly kitty lost all 4 limbs and his tail again. Ah well, he's just a furry slug now ;)|
|Aha, fuzzy belly!!|
|Awww.....! Curled up in a ball next to me on the computer.|
|And again - awwww!|
|Perched comfortably in his usual spot.|
|Our little family.|