I thought I was saved because at some point in my childhood, I had probably said a prayer inviting Jesus into my heart. I recall recommitting my life to Christ a number of times as a teenager in hopes I could guarantee my entrance into heaven. My life, however, was nothing like Christ’s. I went to church, Sunday School, youth group, a Christian high school, had friends that also called themselves Christians, confessed my sins to Jesus, read my Bible, prayed, and grew up in a close family that also called themselves Christians. But I also felt guilty about my sins, spent many nights awake feeling completely terrified by the devil, and committed some pretty horrific sins. But even if I hadn’t committed any sins and had been a very good person, doing all those good things I listed wouldn’t have saved me.
"He saved us,
not because of works done by us in righteousness,
but according to His own mercy" Titus 3:5
(also read Isaiah 64:6, Ephesians 2:8-9, and John 14:6)
I went through a
period of transition time, mainly during my early twenties, when I questioned a
lot of what I believed. God put in me a
desire to know Truth. ("You will seek Me and find Me, when you seek Me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:13) Gradually I came
to understand how Christ saves – and what doesn’t save – a person. Looking back, it was probably around my
mid-twenties that Christ saved me. I
know I am saved because I believe in Him and that His shed blood forgave
me. My sin kept me separated from God. To be allowed in the
presence of God, whether here on earth or in heaven/the new earth after death,
I needed to be perfect, because God is perfect, and He cannot allow
imperfection (sin) in His presence. Obviously I couldn’t make myself
perfect, because I was a sinner. There was nothing at all that I could
ever do that could make me become reconciled with Him. I needed to die to
pay for my sin because the wages of sin is death (Romans 6:23). But God in His love
sent to earth His perfect Son, Jesus, to die so that I wouldn’t have to!
Up until Jesus died on the cross, people had to
sacrifice an animal. But this only reminded them of their sin; it did not take away their sin. (Hebrews 10:3-4, Hebrews 10:11) When Jesus gave up His life, He was the final
sacrifice. ("For by a single offering He has perfected for all time those who are being sanctified." Hebrews 10:14) His shedding of blood forgave me and I no longer have to pay for my own sin. ("without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness of sins." Hebrews 9:22) God took the
judgement for me! I believed in Jesus and what He did on the cross for me and
He forgave me and saved me! God raised Jesus from the dead, He is alive
today, and I will live forever with Christ!
"Truly, truly, I say to you,
whoever hears My word
and believes Him who sent Me has eternal life.
He does not come into judgment,
but has passed from death to life." John 5:24
My life as a Believer
now looks very different than when I used to think I was saved. I have a deep joy that doesn’t go away even
when circumstances are rough. I feel
connected to other Believers and enjoy talking with them about Christ. I feel a deep grief for those, particularly
my loved ones, who aren’t saved, and my husband & I spend time in prayer
for them. Christ has given me freedom
from the guilt I used to live with. Sin
has decreased dramatically in my life, and now when I sin, instead of feeling
guilt, I feel sorrow that I have grieved God and whomever I may have hurt. But I also rejoice, knowing that Christ has
forgiven me! God has proven Himself to
be the God of comfort, hope, peace, encouragement, joy, freedom, and love in my
life. He is continually teaching me and
growing my faith. I am so thankful for
Him! Without Him I am nothing!
* * *
As I mature in the faith, I may come back here from time-to-time and update this testimony. Thank you for taking the time to read this! There are some links below that I highly recommend following and looking into:
If you don't know what the big deal about the Bible is, but you're actually kinda interested in knowing, there is a self-paced video course you can watch for free online that will explain it. It does so without any arm-twisting to try and convince you to believe anything, just explains the Bible and its whole point. Click the image below to be taken to the page:
A blog with excellent articles clearly explaining the gospel. Click image to visit:
