You wanna know something really special? My mom-in-law gave me a copy of the Dear Birthmother letter she wrote back in 1989 when they were hoping to adopt. Fast-forward almost 23 years, and none of us can imagine life without my husband's brother (who was born & adopted in 1990). We are adopting through the exact same agency that my bro-in-law was adopted through, and back in 1990 they'd only been open for a year or two yet.
We are working on writing our Dear Birthmother letter right now. Or I should say, basically I am writing it, and Hubby reads it sometimes and says it's good. It's a hard letter to write. But reading my MIL's letter was really helpful. She just wrote so openly and honestly and simply. What also helped was last weekend my husband and I both sat down and worked together on adoption stuff - me on the letter and he on his PAPQ. I'm hoping we can do something like that again this weekend.
I'm finding it stressful how long everything is taking us. We seem to drag everything out and procrastinate about it all. I don't understand why we do this because both of us really want to start our family - like, years ago. Of course, it doesn't help that we are in the middle of selling both our property next door and selling our house. I'm trying to be content and thankful and to enjoy the here and now.
I want to say as Paul said "I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." Philippians 4:11-12 And if there was anybody who had a lot of tough circumstances, it was Paul!
We dragged our feet I think because its scary! It took us 6 months to complete the application/homestudy process. It really didn't need to take that long. I finally finished everything by reminding myself- its not going to be perfect for everyone but for someone it will be. In the end our birth parents never even saw our letter or book. Eh well.
ReplyDeleteIt took us a year from starting the process to get where we are now, waiting for "The Call". Don't worry about taking your time, it is a lot to do and process and you need to allow yourself to make it a part of your life, not something that you rush through. Good luck with the letter!
ReplyDeleteThat's fantastic she shared (and kept!) that letter from so long ago. Wishing you the best.
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