Summing up 2015...Looking Forward to 2016

2015

My 2015 was a year of highs and lows, big changes and not much change at all.  Here's a recap highlighting my ups and downs of the past year.

1. In mid-January, due to a seizure I had last year in September (I hadn't had any in almost 6 years), we started thinking about not adopting at all.  This was so painful it is almost impossible for me to describe.  The indecision, prayer, talking, and crying went on for months. 
2. In mid-March our agency let us know it was time to do our annual update.  
3. In mid-March we put our condo up for sale again (had tried to sell it the previous year as well).  We loved the renovations we had done but wanted a place with more privacy in the backyard. 
4. At the end of March I had a seizure. 
5. In mid-April, we celebrated our TENTH anniversary!!

   

   My husband and I on our anniversary before going out on a date to Red Lobster.

6. Despite the seizure and our continued consideration of not adopting, we went forward with updating our profile and went for our physicals in April. 
7. At the end of April, we went to our agency for our update meeting, and told them we are putting our adoption on hold.  We decided we needed to get my seizures under control before continuing with adopting.  It hurt but at the same time I was okay with it.
8. TWO DAYS after putting our adoption on hold I had another seizure!  Decided to go up on my medication which I did the following day.
9. In May we went on a 17-day long road trip to celebrate our tenth anniversary!  Leading up to it life was very stressful, what with seizures, putting our adoption on hold, and our condo up for sale.  But it was a good trip.  You can read about it here, here, here, here, here, and here.
10. THREE DAYS after arriving home from our trip, we got an offer on our condo which we accepted that day.
11. In early June we started looking at houses, and a couple weeks later made an offer on one which was accepted within an hour.
12. In late June my husband and my niece both got baptized!
13. On the last day of June the sale of our condo and the purchase of our new home were completed!
14. In early July, we got the news that my husband's mom has been diagnosed with colon cancer.
15. We took posession of our new home, a 1970's 3-bedroom condo, on the last day of July, and started renos right away.
16. We moved in early August and started talking about going active with our agency again, as my seizures seem to be under control!   
17. My mother-in-law had radiation for the last week of August, and in early September had surgery.
18. In September we let our agency know we wanted to go active again which they made happen the next day!  I'm excited and hopeful, but have more of a peace than a desperation like I did before.
19. We went away to a cabin for a weekend with my family like we have done every fall for as long as I can remember, but this year it was our last year.  The 3-bedroom/7-bed cabin has gotten too small for our family of 12!
20. On Thanksgiving Day (October 11) my grandma passed away.  She was 91.  This was the grandparent that I, and everyone in my family, was closest to.  We were next-door neighbours my whole growing-up years.  The funeral was five days later, on my husband's birthday.

    

    My grandma and I at her 90th birthday party almost exactly one year before she passed away.

21. Our country voted for a new prime minister in October and in my opinion made a very big mistake.  (Yes, I'm one of those rare people who actually cares about politics, lol!)
22. In November my mother-in-law started chemo.  She is doing really well. 
23. As of December 1st I quit selling Regal.  
24. On Christmas Day my uncle (my aunt's husband) was in a snowmobile accident.  Three days later, after being taken off life support, he passed away.  It feels completely unreal.  The funeral will be in January.    

So that was my 2015!!  How was your year??  Of course I can't predict 2016, but here are my hopes and expectations:

1. There will be a couple big birthdays in my family.  My sister turning 40 and my other sister's husband turning 45.  Of course my niece that is turning 13 counts that as a VERY big birthday, lol! Cute :)
2. We'll be doing lots and lots of renovations on our house.
3. Of course I really, really hope we'll be chosen to adopt!

To my readers and followers, thank-you for coming by to read my blog, thank-you for sharing my ups and downs with me.  To those of you who also have blogs, I enjoy reading and commenting on yours as well, and sharing in your ups and downs!  See you in 2016 and may you have a happy new year!    

Life

I knew when I started this blog that I wouldn't be a frequent poster, but lately I feel like I've really dropped the ball! Since I've started this blog, I've posted at least once every month, but I even missed a whole month (May - granted, we were gone for 1/2 of it) recently. Sorry about that and thank you to those who keep checking back! (I do try to keep updating our timeline even when I'm not blogging, if you want to check that.)

I haven't been posting much for a couple reasons. Mainly because there's things I could say, but don't want to, so rather than say something, I've said nothing. Also, we've been busy!

March and April were both difficult months. We were gone for 17 days in May, celebrating our 10th  anniversary with a road trip to Alberta and BC. Pretty much the moment we came back, our condo sold and we went house-hunting, and then bought one in June. Hubby's mom got diagnosed with colon cancer in July. We move in August, at which time the renos start. Also, summertime is when Hubby works 11-13 hour days. Whew! I feel worn out just re-reading that list.

Life has been stressful, but I don't feel right complaining. There's been a lot of good, too. It's summertime! Hard times are always easier to handle when I can go outside and enjoy the flowers and heat (I am in my hammock right now - I can hear a baby, which makes me feel sorta happy/sad, and birds, and smell freshly mown lawn, and see my marigolds and apple tree). Hubby & I both have family that loves us and that we love, and they almost all live nearby. Most importantly, Jesus loves me and I love Him. I'm so thankful that He died instead of me and paid for my sin so that I don't have to. He is such a wonderful God and I am so thankful for Him! When everything else goes "wrong", or I have no idea what my purpose is and feel useless and lonely, I can always rely on Him to never change, to never leave me, and to always love me. He is so good!

How has life been going for you lately? Has your summer been relaxing?

Birthdays

Lots of pictures coming up... :)

My birthday was August 12th; I turned 32. 

To celebrate, we had my husband's parents over for a barbeque on Aug. 10th for supper.  We cooked a feast for them and my FIL sang "Happy Birthday" loudly for all the neighbours to hear (thanks, Dad).  They gave me a hammock that I have been wanting for a while and I enjoyed it over the remainder of the summer.

On the 12th, my actual birthday, I had a bit of a crummy day, but in the evening my husband and I went out to a local cafe that we both like.  It was super-busy and loud inside, so we sat outside, which ended up being really nice.  We had hot chocolates which we both decided were the best we'd ever had.

On the 16th we went to the zoo.  I think this was part of my birthday celebrations...but it may have just been because we wanted to; I can't remember!  Regardless, the weather was hot, and we got to see the new polar bear exhibit where you can see the bears swimming over you while you are standing in a clear tunnel, so it was a good time.

On the 17th, we had my side of the family down for the evening.  We had snacks (chips and Rhubarb Upside-down Cake) and here we are playing Probe.

On October 7th my Grandma, on my dad's side, turned 90.  NINETY.  My aunt put together a really nice evening at the care home my Grandma lives at.  She made a meal that was exactly like one my grandma would've cooked years ago.  She decorated the place nicely, there were pictures of my grandma when she was younger, a chalkboard that listed what grocery items cost back in 1924, treats that my grandma used to give to us grandkids, etc.  We took a lot of pictures; my grandma has always liked doing family photos but I think she was a little confused and overwhelmed.  I'm glad we celebrated her, though.  I gave her flowers from my flowerbed; she has always appreciated pretty things.

On the 16th was my husband's birthday; he turned the big 3-0.  We started off the birthday celebrations for him by going out to eat at Red Lobster with his parents and brother on the 13th.  His brother was out visiting for Thanksgiving weekend (from the 10th-13th; we had gatherings on the 11th and 12th).  Hubby really wanted his brother to be part of his birthday celebration, so we tagged along to the airport when Hubby's parents were bringing Hubby's brother there, and went out to supper first.

On the 16th, his actual birthday, he wanted to do the same thing we did for my birthday - go out to the cafe for hot chocolates :)  So we did.  This time it was very un-busy, so we got a couch/armchair corner inside which was nice as they're not always easy to get.  He was pretty tired, as it was a weekday evening, but it was still nice.

On the 17th we had my family over in the evening for snacks - chips & pop, Skor Trifle (his favourite), and spinach dip (definitely not his favourite).  It was a good evening.

On the 18th the two of us went to the aviation museum.  It had been many years since he'd been there and I'd never been there.  Unfortunately the displays were not all in the best condition and the descriptions needed some serious updating, and there was a wedding going on which pretty much forced us out of there, but otherwise it was good for the most part and I'm glad we went.

So those were the big birthday celebrations in August and October!  In September my side of the family went to a cabin for a weekend; something we do every Fall and it was gorgeous weather and a good time.  One of my sisters & her husband celebrated their 10th anniversary in October by going to Yellowstone; there is a number of anniversaries in my family in Fall.  And of course (for us Canadians) there was Thanksgiving in October as well, so with that came 3 family gatherings.  The next big thing is Christmas, oh my!  Not sure if I'm prepared for that yet... :)

Lists with Friends - 1

Today I am starting something called "Lists with Friends".

I don't know much about it - who started it, if it's been going on for longer than just 2014, who can participate, what one's lists are about, what it's point is, really.  So I'm sorry I don't have a link for you to click on.  I'd love if I could find a list (haha) somewhere of all the people participating.

Anyway, from what I have gathered, generally it is a fun blog thing to do if you love making lists (ME!) and it seems like most, if not all, of the people participating are into scrapbooking (ME!) or at least crafts in general.

I'm not sure how often I'll post a list.  I'm not going to commit to one specific day of the week because that type of thing just doesn't work for me.  But we shall see what happens!  Here is my first list:

13 Things I Love Like About Winter
(Because, really, there's not much to love about Winter in Manitoba, Canada!)  I love God's creation (most of it - I could do without spiders!!) and I enjoy photography, so each season you can find me outside, camera in hand, finding things in His creation to praise Him for.  Ever since we moved from the country into town this has required a little more effort & imagination!  But here is what I am thankful for this Winter:

• That first snowfall, when everyone gets excited and is announcing it all over Facebook, and people are boasting about how much they got in their area.  This year our first snow came on October 20, but didn't stay.
  
  
•  The first big snowfall that turns your world white and means Winter is here to stay.  Ours came on November 17.
  
• Any time there is big, fluffy snowflakes floating or swirling down.
• When the pine trees get heavy laden with snow and the branches droop almost to the ground.
• The anticipation of the Christmas season coming.  
• Getting ready for Christmas - shopping for presents, putting up the tree, decorating the house, wrapping presents, the smell of cinnamon candles, Christmas music.
• Going to all the gatherings - spending time with people, exchanging gifts.  All the better if there are those previously mentioned big, fluffy snowflakes on Christmas Day!
• Birthdays in January - two of my nieces and my sis-in-law.  Having parties to attend makes the bitterly cold January go by faster.
• When fog the night before causes there to be stunning frost on everything in the morning.
  
• Blizzards that cause a little excitement.
• Valentine's Day - another thing to help Winter go by a little faster.
• Finding God's beauty in unexpected places - frost patterns on the sidewalk, little birdie footprints in the snow, crazy ice formations on the neighbour's chimney, frost-covered dried-up fruit still hanging from the trees, etc.
• And when a fresh snowfall covers everything in yet another coat of white, covering up the dirt and footprints underneath, I'm often reminded of Psalm 51:7 - "Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow." and Isaiah 1:18 - "Come now, let us reason together, says the Lord:  though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool."

What are your favourite things about Winter?  Are you doing Lists with Friends this year?

Summing up 2013...Looking Forward to 2014

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas.  I did.  I love gatherings, people, presents, etc!  We spent all day Christmas Eve at Hubby's parents' with them and Hubby's brother who was home from university for the holidays.  Christmas Day was spent with my mom-in-law's side of the family at Hubby's uncle & aunt's.  Boxing Day was spent at my parents'.  I always look forward the most to Christmas at my parents' and this year was no exception.  The next day we got a bit of a break until suppertime when we went out to eat with my dad's side of the family.  A lot of these people I only see once a year.  The next day we finally had Christmas with just the 2 of us.  It was very relaxing and I didn't have to worry about food (I am intolerant to a lot of foods) and we could just enjoy each other.  Of course I am still hopeful that it was the last Christmas with just the 2 of us, but who knows!  God does, and I like knowing He's in control. 

To read my summing up 2012 post, click here.

2013 was a year of a lot of changes.  The main things (that I am willing to share) were:

1. We bought a new place and started renovations.  
2. Hubby switched positions at his job from being a truck driver to working in the office.
3. Moved from the country into town.
4. Completed all the adoption paperwork we've been working on for so long and submitted our file to our agency.
5. Hubby got politely fired from his office job for refusing to ask his drivers to break rules.  After we got over being devastated, we decided he will continue pursuing his flight training instead of driving truck again like they offered him.
6. Both homestudy interviews got scheduled and rescheduled until they were finally completed.
7. We got officially approved to adopt and started waiting on May 14.
8. My sister E landed up in the hospital due to pancreas inflamation.  She was in good spirits so unlike the whole cancer thing she went through last year.  She had surgery to have her gallbladder out.
9. Started hosting our church group at our house for church every Sunday morning.  Up til now we'd always had it at my brothers'.  We are a small group of 8 regulars but I love them all dearly.
10. I became an independent rep for Regal to start helping earn a little income.
11. Hubby completed his flight training and passed his flight tests.  He put in applications for flying jobs.
12. Hubby started driving truck again, for a different company, as we wait for a flying job offer.
13. We had adoption maternity pictures taken with a professional photographer.  It was a great experience and we love the pictures!
14. I had a benign cyst removed from my breast.  Did not enjoy being awake for the surgery!
15. We reached the 6 month mark of being approved.  Found out we haven't been shown yet which was not surprising but still disappointing.
16. Hubby and his fellow employees were laid off for the Winter.  He has applied for EI which we are waiting on but he does get called in to work some days, usually to haul snow after blizzards.

Of course there were also many not-so-big things interspersed throughout the year, happy things and sad things both.  Ultimately I am just so thankful to God that He is unchanging!

Here are some of the things I am looking forward to in 2014, the Lord willing:

1.  Well, obviously I think it would be AWESOME if we would be matched and be blessed with a baby!  
2. It's my hubby's big 3-0 this year.  I would love to throw him a huge surprise party but he is an introvert and big crowds of people is so not his thing.  And definitely not surprises!  
3. Assuming we don't have a baby by then, we'll be updating our profile this Spring, since it will be the 1 year mark.
4. I'm hoping God will answer some of my prayers with a "yes!".
5. I'm sure there are other things I am looking forward to in 2014, I just can't think of them right now!

 Just one more thing.  Remember that little yellow baby blanket my mom started knitting for me last year?  Well, shortly before Christmas she finished it and gave it to me.  So precious.  Here it is:

Oh, and you know how I was pessimistically saying I didn't think I would get any baby-related stuff as gifts this Christmas?  Well, I was wrong.  I'm starting to feel like I don't need a pre-baby shower after all, because people are definitely showing me they care!

These are onesies, sleepers, a blanket, and a soother with clip that my mom-in-law, bro-in-law, and dad gave me this Christmas.  Feeling loved :)

Sunshine Award(s)!

Two sunshiney people from the ALI blogging world have nominated me for the Sunshine Award!  Yay!  I feel so special :)  It feels good to know people read & appreciate your blog.

So here are the rules:

• Proudly post your sunshiney new award
• Answer the 11 questions from the blogger who nominated you
• Nominate 11 wonderful bloggers
• Write 11 questions for them to answer
• Let the nominated blogger know you have nominated them

So here are the 11 questions from the first person who nominated me, Kristen from Adoption Love:

1. What is the best advice you've ever gotten?  I have gotten a lot of good advice in my life, that come to my mind at different times.  To try and recall the best piece of advice right now? I'm not sure if I can do.  But I can remember some good pieces of advice right now:  my dad once told me to not waste time feeling embarrassed or stupid.  My mother-in-law, who is a wealth of very gentle advice (perfect for my personality!) has told me that people who are very sensitive (who cry easily, are hurt easily - traits usually viewed as negative) are the very same people who are also sensitive to others - people who are gentle, kind, patient, etc.  She is very correct.  By the way, this sensitive person I am describing is my husband :)
2. What is your first childhood memory?  I don't know what my first memory was.  I have a lousy memory!  It's nothing significant, but I do seem to have a faint recollection that I used to be able to walk under the dining room table, and then one day realizing my eyes could peek above it and I could no longer walk right under it.
3. If you could choose another time in history to live, when would it be?  Every time in history has it's pros and cons, but I would like to try living in the "Little House on the Prairie" days.  I really love the sense of family, of working together, playing together.  Although it would've been a lot of hard work and access to doctors was rare, I think it would've been a really simple time.  No technology so thus not a lot of ignoring each other.  Knowing how to sew your own clothes, cook from scratch, garden, farm.  Be outdoors a lot.  A simple, steady faith in God.  Helping your neighbours out (even if they were miles away) was something you didn't even think twice about.
4. What's the last book you read and what was it about?  I just finished "Behind the Veil", the 3rd and last book in the Royal Pavilions series by Linda Chaikin.  She is one of my favourite Historical/Christian/Romance/Mystery/Fiction authors.  The series is from the days of the crusades, and the books contain a lot of sword fights and "intrigue". 
5. How did you meet your significant other?  I met my hubby when we both started working at a new Tim Horton's that opened up in our town.  We actually didn't work a lot of the same shifts, but enough that we started to get to know each other a little.  At first we didn't express any of the interest we had in each other, because I am two years older, and when you're 18 and 16, that seems like a big difference, lol!  Also I was dating someone else at the time.  He was secretly very happy when that relationship ended.  We started to get together as friends, sometimes with other people, and eventually he asked me out :)
6. What's the best way to get on your good side?  Chocolate!  And I really appreciate it when people listen to me and take me seriously.  Here's another good piece of advice I was given, by a teacher back in highschool:  when you ask how someone is doing, ask sincerely and then really listen to their answer.  This stuck with me and I try not to do the frivolous "hi how are you" thing.  So you get on my good side if you genuinely ask me how I am and then take the time to listen.  Bonus points if next time I see you, you remember what I said!  But I do also accept gifts of chocolate :D
7. What's your favourite thing to do on a Saturday morning?  Sleep in with my hubby!!!
8. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?  When I think of all the natural disasters, I think I might actually stay right where I am.  Yes, we have minimum 5 months of snow, cold, wind, ice, and blizzards, but at least we don't have tsunamis, hurricanes, earthquakes, etc, and only occasional, not very severe, tornadoes. 
9. What has been your favourite "adoption moment" so far?  I think I will sum this answer up and say it is all the sweet things people have said to us.  All the congratulations, the "you'll be a good mom" comments, the "I'm praying for you" encouragements, etc.  Every one of these kind words tells me that people are thinking of us, remaining hopeful even when we lose hope, want the best for us, and are excited for us.
10. What would your family pet say to you if they could talk?  Last year we gave away our cat, my Smacky baby, of 7 years, to my brother and sis-in-law.  So I hope he'd say "I miss you, Mom!"
11. What is the airspeed velocity of a laden swallow?  Sorry, Kristen, I have no idea what this means.  A movie quote, I'm guessing?

Here are the 11 questions from the second person who nominated me, Ethan from The Littlest Brooks-Livingston:

1. What’s one of the songs in your current Ipod / cd player / Pandora rotation and why do you like it?  Turning on my iPod, the first song that shows up is "Manger Medley" by David Phelps from his album Joy, Joy.  Yes, I've been listening to Christmas music!  Why do I like this song?  Because I love pretty much anything by David Phelps :)
2. What is one thing you’re deathly afraid of?  I could put Kristen's answer #8 verbatim into this one!  But also, well, they have 8 legs and they're not octopuses - but they're almost as big!
3. Who makes you laugh?  Almost anyone - I laugh pretty easily!  My father-in-law is usually the one to make me laugh til my face hurts, though.
4. Presuming you can cook, what’s your favorite thing to cook?  I love to cook and I honestly don't know if I can come up with just one dish.  I do really enjoy chopping vegetables though - there's something calming about it.  And it's just fun to wield a chef's knife and pretend I'm a professional!
5. Describe your most embarrassing moment – if you’re anything like me, you might need it narrowed down – of 2013.  I never can find an answer to this question!  Perhaps it's because of my dad's advice (see above) to not waste time feeling embarrassed and stupid??  I know I do embarrass myself regularly; I just can't think of an example right now.
6. What’s the weirdest job task you’ve ever had?  I don't know if I've had to do anything exceptionally weird.  I've really only had 3 main jobs in my life time (coffee shop, grocery store, fishing lodge).  One thing we had no choice but to do at the fishing lodge, even though it wasn't directly part of the job, was clear mice out of our cabin regularly.  Hubby & I had one tiny cabin that we lived in for about 4 months, and it had a lot of mice.  In the toilet, falling from the ceiling...  In the night the trap would always go off and I'd wake Hubby up to go dump the mouse outside and reset it. 
7. What’s one parenting moment you’re looking forward to most?  Just one? :)  Perhaps Baby falling asleep contentedly in my arms.  But I am also looking forward to simply everyday life as a family.
8. Would you rather have a wand or a light saber?  I'd rather not have either, thanks anyway, Ethan!
9. What book is on your nightstand?  I currently have 3 on my nightstand - my Bible (currently reading), "Eternal Security" by Charles Stanley (currently reading), and "The Terrible Hours" by Peter Maas (done reading).
10. What childhood moment will you try to recreate with your child(ren)?  The childhood memory I have that I hoped my child(ren) would have is playing with cousins, but as life's turning out, my child(ren)'s cousins will be a lot older than they.  So maybe just using their imagination and being creative.
11. (Stealing this one from Kristen): What’s your favorite adoption moment so far?  As this was "stolen" from Kristen :) I have already answered it (see above).

Now to nominate 11 wonderful bloggers who have brought a little sunshine to my life.  (I will just do 11 bloggers and 11 questions, even though I have been nominated twice.)

B&B and The Big Decision
Grafting Our Family Tree
Jim and Amy Hoping to Adopt
Waiting for Baby
Unexpected Dreams
Until Forever...
In Due Time
Seeds of the Heart
Love, Matt and Kara
Trying for a Baby (Adopting)
Our Adoption Story

1. What do you see when you look out your window right now?
2. Who would you love to be able to have a conversation with again right now?
3. Are you more inclined to pick a sweet snack or a salty snack? 
4. What's one of the most thought-provoking things you've heard or read lately?
5. Are you a cat person or a dog person?
6. If you could pick one character trait for your child to develop, what would it be?
7. Are you more content doing nothing or being busy?
8. What is something you would like to change about how many people view adoption/loss/infertility?
9. What's your favourite restaurant and why?
10. When it comes down to it, what/who is all that really matters to you?
11. If you won the lottery, what's one thing you'd spend money on that people would think you were slightly crazy for doing?

Looking forward to reading everyone's answers! :)